'Ponders of an intelligent Idiot'

YEAAAAAH SO I WAS A LAZY FUCKER =]

I do have good excuses though, on friday night I was feeling a bit sicky after my third rice and vegi stir fry in a row which is completely understandable!

and last night I was just knackered after a night out with David and his mates at Bernard Shaws, which is a pretty amazing wee place.

To be honest I am not really in the mind-set for even doing a blog now, just because I am so much in my head its annoying.  I think its probably because of the hangover? Either way I hate the feeling >.<

BUT I am distracting myself with Taking Back Sunday awesomeness which I am REALLY looking forward too.  I will be dancing LOADS.WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

Listening to the new album just now on youtube and it is pretty epic. So yeah dance! dance! dance!

Heres David. I promised him a little bit to write in my blog.

Planning on remaining mysterious for the time being. BAM.

cool.

 

So a third of the way through my wee challenge eh? Score.

 

Meh, the next chapter in bleach isn’t out yet as being translated, and from what I see of the japanese chapters its basically a silly waste of time.  But I guess that team bleach need to waste some time to come up with new ideas, it seems to be faltering slightly.

I cannot get ‘Bella lullaby’ out of my head! God damn it! It is really frustrating, the music is so beautiful too I wish I could play music that well.  Any sort of music or instrument. Carter Burwell made the song, seems they do alot of music for movies…

Today was pretty good – got loads done in work to the point I was looking at my list of jobs going : WTF IM DONE ALREADY!? I MUST HAVE MISSED SOMETHING….nope I just worked really well.  Did a nice couple of dressing in some betty jackson gear.

Spent the night playing XBOX – Nearly completed Fable 2 – slightly cheated when I made the time go forward so I could get loads of cash for Brightwood tower, but it was worth it :) the game is rather repetative but I enjoy it.

OH and I was reminded that I have Taking Back Sunday this Sunday to go to! TOTALLY FORGOT. Jenny reminded me today, so I need to save some pennies for that.  Cheap dinners.

Wonder whats happening tomorrow night…could do with a couple of cans or a bottle of wine for nice chillouts…oh shit I need to reply to Phils text! Balls.

Well nothing much else to say.

Night x

 

Evening,

Not really much to talk about today.  Dee was off to a training session in town so I was working myself – and got the same gumpf when she got back “Why it did it take so long…” etc.. etc.. but I had the benefit of my wee notepad with my times and logs of what was going on to back me up and get her off my back.

SCORE.

My memory really is terrible for what happens through the day, I guess that is my short-term memory not registering enough stuff important enough to remember.  I wonder if I am that pompous to take no-interest in any other peoples lives and what is going on apart from my own…hope to god not.  Or if I am, I am very good at it.

Had a lazy evening with Stephen on the couch watching some friends and will&grace – we had good craic as we followed onto Come Dine with me.  It was nice to relax and just chill out but I made up for it now.

Felt guilty for being lazy the past couple of days so cooked up a massive vegi stir fry with rice, tided my room to stop it getting messier, sorted out the dish-washer and made my cup of green tea before bed.  Currently listening to phantom FM ready to go to sleep.  Will after my tea. 

I really need to make more time to read Dracula, and also try and slot in a time to constantly read over the driving book that sarah gave me to get some sort of knowledge on it. Got Neill sorted out for giving me driving lessons, which might be sarcasm but I will try and make it a reality soon enough.

Anyway, time to turn of the laptop, enjoy my tea and brush my teeth before I snore away.

Night.

xx

 

I was talking to an old acquaintance I knew back in Glasgow who told me that his life is going well all he needs now is a ‘fella’.

Seriously, why do we all think that it takes someone else in our life to just walk in and make it whole?  I once learned when I studied Economics in College that humans psychologically constantly ‘need’.  We are never satisfied and we continue to develop our needs to limitless possibilities.  But that really is off subject.  My main point is the fact that we are brought up thinking/assuming we always need that ‘other-half’ to complete ourselves rather than being whole as we are.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the feeling I have when I am with David and we hang out and we just have laughs! It feels great and I even love the feeling when he isn’t here only because then I realise that I am thinking about wanting him here. 

And that shows I like him loads. 

But before I was going out with David I wasn’t looking or searching for anyone, I was happy and rolling with the punches and just seeing how I got on.  I didn’t need that ‘other-half’ because I was already me and already a whole.  David is just the bad-ass shiny accessory*** to my life, still a part of me but not if that makes sense?  We are two different people that share a really nice connection and that is how I view our relationship. We are together but I don’t see him as making me whole he is the person that takes the limits of the amount of fun I have in life to a whole new level. I would lose this new level if he ever left my life which would be a gutter.  I am just trying to justify my reason as to people not viewing themselves as whole.  No wonder we always want another half.

(Oh and I am considering Electric Picnic since I noticed Dinosaur Jr. are playing.)

***Too be honest I can’t really justify David as an accessory because he is just much more than that. He is my boyfriend and he is an awesome one at that.  Even if we don’t get to see each other that much we still try and its better seeing him a little a week rather than never.  Hmmm….

Wooooooooo

I done a full week worth of journals.  Rather happy with that.

So you will be happy to know I will not be updating to the extent I did yesterday since today was not as long.  Started work at 7am and got to catch up with babs since she got back from her holiday to Wales, she had a good time.  I would love to go to Wales, even if it was just for the accent <3.

I maintained a point of writing down everything I was doing during the day, it did feel like we didn’t get a lot done but that is just because it was only a few massive jobs rather than loads of little ones.  But apart from that work was fine.

Headed out with Phil to go see yer man from Twilight – the dad one Dr. Cullen.  He was a bit of a ride to be honest, but he was also a celebrity and I don’t have much attraction to people with status so it sort of brought him down from ride to good looking fellow.  We had such great craic in the queue waiting to see this man (which we queued for 3hours for!") Ruth better damn appreciate the present.

Okay journal is shit today. I'm not even going to keep writing rubbish.

Night.

 

Dear Journal.

Today was awesome! Especially compared to yesterday.  So this post is going to be long-winded and boring for everyone and will mainly be used for its purpose. A view-point of my day through my eyes to look back on.

It was a very long morning – woke up around 8.30am I think and well I probably could have stayed in bed till about 1 if I wanted to but I had to get up and pee. 

I decided once [I was up – I was up]

Last night seemed to be a bit of a bonding session for me and Tyson. I just acted like he was a dog.  That sounds weird but with all the ‘respect/disrespect’ chat I have been getting from Stephen I just found it hard to treat Tyson just like a dog and easier to treat him more like a thing to control.  The thing is, it’s all about respect but not not about controlling respect.  More a mutual respect.

Mutual respect is really important in any relationship.  We are all brought up with the idea of control and power.  That develops into wanting to control things and ‘be over them’ on the food-chain.  Why don’t we just see that we are all just dealing with the same shit!? Mutually respect each other to just get on with it, rather than trying to control each others shit and show them how to live with it.

After breakfast of tea and porridge I threw on some clothes and headed out with Tyson for a walk.  I was in two-minds to take him on a long walk and decided I will choose when I reach the enterance/exit of my estate.  As soon as I got there Tyson automatically turned round to go home.  Guess I didn’t need to decide.

I woke Stephen up rather early just to ask where the dog food was.  He got kinda pissed off but I wouldn’t let the wee thing starve until he got up late into the afternoon.

So afterwards I got changed into some proper clothes (trousers, shirt, tie, cardigan and cons.) and headed into town contemplating how long a morning it has been.

I feel much better today after a big walk through temple bar – seeing the wee book festival they have and being reminded of some funny memories. E.g. Fringe 08. So I was sitting in the Cha teahouse where I always get crap service but love the place.  They just seem rather ignorant and don’t acknowledge you very well or smile or even just talk to you to say ‘hi hows it going’.  Maybe I expect a small independant quirky store like that to be perfect but I get worse customer service there than I do in any major starbucks. But maybe I have to view the better side – the disgruntled worker is way better than the fake smiles of starbucks.

Oh and I started reading Dracula again – which is interesting considering my tea was blood red.

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Jesus I must have been in a daydream after the tea-house, I’ll be fucked if I can remember anything after it. I guess I just got lost in thought…I’ll try and retrace my steps.

I went to urban outfitters and bought Tyson a little sherrifs kit with blue bandana and sherriff badge to wear. As David said he has finally ‘come out’ – well they do say some dogs mirror their owners.  God knows if this is also true for behaviour.  Does remind me of big gay al’s dog from south park.

So afterwards I headed to the winding staircase bookshop (my favourite) – the old bearded love of my stalker life no longer works there.  God damn it! Ha. Nothing really took my interest so I boosted to Topshop to visit Amy who wasn’t working so wandered round to Jess and had major catch ups.  Jordan got the job in Urban outfitters so that is awesome. *cough* discount *cough*

Nothing else really happened, visited tower records and flipped through the Gay Times and Attitude but didn’t bother buying.  Seen Lily Allen get her babs out for i-D.

So then I ended up doing my old school thing of a pint of cider and a good book sitting in the front lounge, if I was 30 years older I would have looked like some prowling pervert of a gay old man.  Especially a weird one reading dracula!

So yeah that was it….im so putting the rest into bullet points.

- Shot down someone who asked for my number – HARSH.

- Watched some t.v. and had toast and tea for dinner.

- Chatted to Davids (Boyfriend and friend)

- Really had major urges to get stoned and contemplated trying to figure out making hash into tea – ended up with a recipie for hot chocolate and a want to watch spirited away.

- Chats were fragmented with me and david – I hate not seeing him more than I do!

Thats it.

Night x

 

1/6th of the way till I have finished my 30 day challenge. 

Ah my head is just really weird today, I did nothing so my brain didn’t get used and is just feeling so blank now. Oh god I better quit while I am ahead before this post becomes emo.

ANYWAY – Yeah so I slept in for ages this morning which was really nice. Got up around 1ish and sort of just farted about the house wondering what to do, I ended up finishing my room and cupboard but didn’t hover BECAUSE…I got this really weird train of thought.

I would have nothing left to do.  I know it is such a nihilistic view as though there is nothing left so I would just stop. But that is how I felt, just completely unchallenged or motivated to move onto something else.  If I did the hovering then it’d all be done, it would be (as David put it) “final”. 

Too be honest, the idea really frightened me a bit. So I turned on Motion City Soundtrack and lay on my bed for ages and then clocked a picture of Kate on my windowsill and just thought at that moment I have never missed her more than I did then.

The rest of the day I just popped down to Spar and picked up some food, was texting Jenny who is going to be having some Michael Jackson party in a couple of months and I need to dress as a Michael Jackson (I want to do the zombie/peter pan version from South Park).

I just realised I never told David any of this, I don’t know why, maybe I just forgot.  But it is probably cause I am sort of just drifting and hardly thinking tonight. 

Really happy I spoke to Becca tonight, nice to hear how she is getting on since it has been ages! I was dickish and never replied to her last post.  I know she may read this so she should know I didn’t know how to ask about her graduation without it showing I never asked earlier. HA I am a coward.

Get better soon Becca.

Oh and talking about getting better, my right nostril has been acting like it has a cold but the left one is fine. Ha.

Played some XBOX and I think I am over it, want to sell it now ha.  Games just seem so pointless, there is a storyline that has no relevance or use for real life you just repeat certain actions with increasing challenge until you win and develop skills you will never use again. SCORE. Once you know the theory its rather redundant really.

OKAY THATS IT.

Time for tea and bed.  Going to get up early and go out tomorrow and do something nice.  Maybe go to a photography exhibit I saw or else I will visit the botanic gardens.

Night. Sorry this is such a pathetic post.

 

Have to admit I nearly never updated today.  Trying to update around 9.30pm each night but I ended up watching ‘The Haunting in Connecticut’.  The movie is actually okay, I love all the haunting with a storyline movies.  Not exactly mind-blowing but the story is okay, even if the plot is predictable.

I feel like I should involve more wacky phrases in my blog tonight because I am listening to some indie tunes all the cool kids in London are listening too (http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=6110151). How about…

Toys alive! No…too simple and not random enough…maybe need to be a bit more specific…

Octopus tennis! Okay I clearly suck at making Indie phrases…last try I need a situation to base it on…a night out in a rubbish club…

“Omg…It is such a…ZOMBIE FEST” – ach fuck it. I give up.

Today was pretty good I had a completely ‘professional’ mask on today.  Wore trousers and shoes rather than baggies and converse.  Listened more than I spoke. I also made a point of writing down EVERYTHING I done.  I mean everything including the time I did it. e.g.

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7.04 : Checked Work planner, e-mail to check any updates for the morning.

7.08 : Got rails and have taken them to Jasper Conran to de-stock the back wall.

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Yes I was that anal.  Handed it to the boss at the end of the day just for proof of my day, I can’t believe I need to justify it that way.  But what the hell if it means I get less shit to deal with then I don’t mind at all.

Got of work an hour early – as did David – so I waited for him at star bucks till he got off the Luas and we checked out a couple of new exhibits in the rua red gallery beside work.  It was pretty cool. I love the fact that me and David have such different tastes, it makes everything much more interesting.

“I mean it is just the photograph of a chip-shop with a wee woman in it, anyone could have done that! In fact it looks like an advertisement for the chip-shop!!” He was so annoyed it was funny.

We had couple time and a wee nap which was awesome, although one of those ones you don’t actually realise you fell asleep!? Carried over to having some dinner from justeat.ie – my first take out this week since I have been cooking loads!

So just finished the film and now onto this….Cool. Well I am going to arse about on the net a bit before bed.  What the hell will I do tomorrow!? Need a plan…

Night.

 

Dear Journal,

Just listening to the new bloc party song that is out – its okay but so many of their songs, especially the popular ones all just sound the same…although I like the sort of funky 90’s dance piano going on in the tune.

Ah today was pretty much a disaster… I sort of had a feeling it would be especially considering this morning I just felt rubbish.  Had so many thoughts just randomly passing through my head at such an early time and it was just pissing me off. 

Gladly got lost in some Interpol, which is a band I am really loving.  Its all about the music as well as the lyrics! Plus it is nice to just get lost in their melodies.

It was really all from work… the disaster that is. They expect so much from you sometimes that you wonder how it is humanly possible, but at the end of the day it is only a meaningless job.  I understand people with passion for their work, but people with passion for just undermining and walking over people? 

That is just sick. 

(HA WORKING MANS BLUES BY BOB DYLAN CAME ON. PERFECT.)

I need to take note of everything from now on in work, just to keep myself right and keep note of the workload that I have.  Time myself and learn to justify my reasons for doing something.  I know how to do my job, okay sometimes I can’t be fucked and just do stuff at a minimal degree of professionalism but it is still right and passable, I never do a shit job.

Perfection is something that can never be achieved if it could be then what would be the challenge? Think about it, perfection is something desired and constantly aimed towards and used to motivate but can never actually be achieved. If we all could achieve perfection there would be no challenge.  No spur to develop and move on because it is already perfect. And the thing is, the world is all about change and developing, so something that is ‘perfect’ one minute won’t be the next.  So…timeless Perfection can never be achieved.  Sorry lost in thought.

I wasted today because of my bad mood and I put David into an awkward position, I don’t think he really knew what to say.  Well he did say that.  I don’t mind because at least he tried.  I am surprised I phoned him. I always keep my problems to myself and sort of deal with them and never share them.  Strange for me to want to talk to David about it, but I guess that means something.

My room isn’t tided, the websites I have been scowering through haven’t be touched, I even just had sandwiches for dinner and my washing isn’t in my cupboard all because of this mood.

Ah well you need to have bad moods, its part of life – as much as I sound like an ancient old weathered man there I just want to say I am a big believer in Ying and Yang as an example of how we experience life.  Here is another big thought train, feel free to ignore.

You need the bad in life, because if you don’t have the bad then you can’t know what the good is.  Without something to compare with, e.g. I feel so good because of this cup of tea compared to how bad I felt sitting in a bad mood.  It really is simple.

Anyway, one funny thing happened today, Derek in work downloaded some spyware with mega porn and it installed on his google browser and he was panicking on how to get rid of it because of his (pregnant) girlfriend was planning on using the computer tonight.  Wonder how he got on. =].

Night.

P.S Tomorrow will be excellent.

 

Dear Journal,

So this is day two of my 30 day journal challenge…running a bit late because I had to hang up a washing and clean the dishes.

I have been a big bitch of a housewife today – 99% of my clothing is now clean after being scrubbed, I also cleaned the majority of my room – even got under the bed and the cases sorted so I now have one case for letters and official documents, one for books and one for cds and dvds.  Got the cool stuff left out though for easy access.  Just got my wardrobe to clean out tomorrow and then its all done!

Today was shattering, was a bit late for work after planning to get up so early and start my morning routine.  But got there for the new Tripp shop-fit and they took ages! I needed to try and squeeze all the stock moves in the space of around 45 minutes for two departments.  Luckily I had help from some of the girls in work and we got it all done in time and it looks okay.  Only problem is I need to install a pelmet into the new warm shop department because the one I got was too small >.<.

Oh and I have a new superpower, I am spirit-level man! Ha. I complete 4 pieces of branding on 4 departments and had every letter straight without a use of a spirit-level (since ours is fucked)!  So woo-ho!I am pretty straight to an extent.

And on the flip-side a little bit bent, in which case today I spoke to David on the phone for ages =] It doesn't matter what we talk about, even if we have spoke about it before, we just always find new ways to say it and keep it fresh.  I really like him for that.

Kick-ass curry-making skills today, green Thai one with chicken from last night.  Tasted great with rice, but now I am really really full up! Can’t wait for my cup of tea before bed. Shower too.

OH! Kate sent me messages today! Must remember to reply! Miss her face and laughs loads, she could make me laugh so much with the most silly comment. Or even telling our old stories e.g. Hot Rod, Phil Collins on the Bus with the Polish.

So just talking to Dave on Skype, discussing the GLBT film festival coming up in Dublin called gaze (gaze.ie) and shoving some music onto my iTunes.  May try some meditation tonight before bed if I am not to tired, only because I found my old Sri Chinmoy flute music C.D. from my old meditation class.

Night. x

 

Dear Journal,

So its the 14th of July. 

Today I realised I probably should check my bank-account just to gauge how well my finances are doing. They are plummeting like a rock over a cliff since I have my ‘I have loads of money attitude’ on. So I have €300 euro-ish to last me till the very end of the month…..smashing.

So today I headed out and spent €11 on a massive chicken, bread and little Tupper-wear dishes.  Bargain dunnes eh? So cooked my chicken and then mixed it up into an amazing stir-fry with soy sauce, shoved the rest in a container and boxed it up for sandwiches tomorrow and I plan on using the rest for a massive curry tomorrow night to take into work for lunch on Thursday.  So I am well fed till Thursday and I think I’ll play with pasta from then until Monday for some cheap eats.  I sound so well organised…now to actually do it.

As you may, or may not know, I have a tendency to so I will do things and then just can’t be fucked to do them.  Honestly I do that.  So lets hope I don’t this time (even though I am already thinking I can easily afford dominos by the end of the week).

So what else today…woke up craving some Iron and wine tunes! and after listening to flightless bird, American mouth. I turned to Imogene Heap and listened to her debut 1998 album i Megaphone  – currently working my way through the second (Speak for yourself,2005).  Its okay, but not brilliant and in fairness its purely the lyrics that make her songs but sometimes her little yodels get annoying and I zone out and just can’t be cunted.

Work was grand – Dee came in telling me she was ‘rested’ to which I replied ‘YOU WERE ARRESTED!? WTF HAPPENED” and then I realised I just misheard her. XD.  Was also completing priority 1 and priority 3 windows (I was on my hands and knees in priority 3 blowing dust out of a sitting mannequins crotch, it was amusing to the people outside along with the fact I had odd socks on)

Oh I told David I love him…but I won’t speak about it much here since I need to speak about it to him first in-person this week and I know he’ll read this ;).

Not really talking to Tyson yet, since he decided to cunt off yesterday and get lost.  But then again I am no longer mad since he looks like a cute teddy bear and he has not got a clue why we are still mad.

That’s really it for today…going to bed soon after a nice cuppa tea.

G’night

Okay right.

Im just here to say - “Fuck me” – Life just seems to have zoomed right past my little head and now I need to catch up.

Right I am turning a bit mega-maniac and going to adopt that ridiculous method of Goal Orientated Motivation.  So here are my Goals.

1) Visit Australia (Already in the Motions)

2) Spend between 30 mins to an hour at least four days a week learning : Guitar, Japanese.

3) Do Brain Training every morning.

4) Every Sunday organise a massive shop for the week and organise all my meals.

5) Before going to bed do a quick tidy of my bedroom.

6) Start Volunteer work for councilling experience.

7) Read a book for 30 mins before sleeping as much as possible.

Today I was on this artists website : Twisted 4rk

It shows of loads of little speech bubbles and what they would look like if they were the emotions they were conveying rather than the words.

So I took a shot at doing one.

P.S I am also now a member of Twitter - follow me @ Twitter Homepage

Labels: art, distractedindub, drawing, emotions, speech bubbles, twisted 4rk, twitter

All I can say is ARG! and not in the fun pirate Arg sort of way but in a really-trying-to-express-the-amount-of-pent-up-emotion sort of way. 

First work, what a load of shite this is! I was in Glasgow yesterday and got offered a position, but its only a poxy 20 hours so that does fuck all for me since I would need to find a house and all that jazz if I moved back.  But I spoke to Norma on level one menswear and she said she would look out for another 16 hours elsewhere for me bringing me up to the desired 36.

BUT OLD PEOPLE – REALLY! They are the reason its shit.  My store looks as though (I will be using the word shit alot since my literate section of brain has been turned off this evening) its just a piece of shit.  Glasgow looked brilliant and they had 6 members of staff on the floor compared to us who have a minimum of 4 on at least a quarter of the Glasgow floor size! SERIOUSLY WHY THE FUCK IS THAT HAPPENING. (Also caps lock will be used alot but really I am being dramatic)

So I had a massive rant about all the old fucks who don't give a shit – can’t teach an old Dog/decrepit-fucked-up-waste-of-human-DNA new tricks eh?

Today I did do some fuck off amazing display work on men shirts – got some ties and ‘roushed’ them (Its my word for it because I don't think there is one) and they looked so bad ass – then did some other really spring-like nice displays.

So yeah rant over, well I could rant a bit at the fact I can never take a nice photograph but that's just vain and ridiculous and I feel I have said enough for some comments like ‘Aw you look good’ to make me feel better? thanks?

Gays are dicks too. Seriously fucked up about this Leo thing but I ran out of energy for this now so I cannot be bothered explaining.

I feel better though =] so thanks Dean for letting me get the idea to use a blog in the first place.

SHIT (Just cause)

x

 

Now Playing : What Is Happening - Alphabeat - This Is Alphabeat

I loved last night, it was just a night were I couldn’t stop smiling.  Great company and just interesting in general.  Met Ruth's new beau Phil who was a really sweet and hyper guy and really imaginative. 

The fact I was just tipsy and not really drunk also made it since I could actually just look at what was going on rather than leaning against a wall trying to stay awake or being stuck on repeat with the one dance move on the floor.  You know that one you move your head like a pigeon and move your hands as though you are running forward?  Nope? Just me then.

I was different last night, I just enjoyed the company and everyone in it rather than gazing off into the crowds people watching (well not all night), not that I don’t always enjoy the company I just like to be sort of separate yet part of a group and watch from outside the box in a way…I don’t think anyone will really understand what I am trying to say =].

Oh and Farz and Matthew were being all hardcore, they nearly got in a fight because someone kept calling Farz “Sarah”.  Ah I just hate big conflicts like that, the ones where its so pointless and you just look like those fools you see fighting drunkenly.  But it all worked out fine – although Farz has some amazing fighting energy he is so small and I didn’t expect it from him.

Caught up with Bleach this morning =]

I can’t get out of bed, need to watch skins and need to eat something.  Bleh I hope I left money in my wallet for Dominos tonight.

I decided to start this as well, it seems like the done thing to do and I have reason that it will hopefully hold benefits to myself. This all seems a bit way too pompous already, I guess that is how I see blogs.

Like you see a critic judging a piece of art and using big words like “Voluptuous” and… ha-ha. Yeah I can’t think of any other to describe Art… and lets not discuss the fact why I think the word Voluptuous has fuck all to do with it either. He has his own opinion and maybe it is based on years of training in University but it all still seems a bit fake possibly because I don’t understand it but I am more likely going to agree with it being fake.

Ohhhhhh wow thought…I think its fake because I don’t understand it? Behaviourist psychologists believe that people fear the unknown and that fear itself causes the fight or flight reflex, clearly I am a fighter…

So yeah I feel a bit lost already, what am I supposed to say?

Okay lets start with this.. So many people have passion and interest in the world and their advancement as people and they wonder how they can better themselves to achieve their ambitions so I wonder why I lack it or maybe it isn’t everyone that has it? Like one person has brown eyes and another has blue?

I am happy to be me and roll with the punches, okay I should make more of an effort sometimes but should I feel ashamed I don’t want to be this amazing visual manager or a fantastic writer….I have dreams but they are of things surreal and random and really they are just daydreams. Ah there you go, you just clicked “This ones a procrastinator” – well I tell you fuck off. =]

This blog has no purpose but to be able to put my thoughts down and consider different ideas of people and who they are – I guess it will be my Psychological Study of People. But not all the time.

I guess it also will help people look at my mind and get an idea of how I think? To maybe understand me a bit more since I don'to think people realise alot of what I am thinking. =]

That's it so far, love it, hate it, enjoy it, look forward to it. Up to yourself really.